NOTE: This is an article I wrote for Our Voices Magazine that I thought I’d share with you.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Men don’t like Valentine’s Day. Did you know that?

And many times Valentine’s Day turns out traumatic for women… kind of because men hate it, get really confused and feel guilty because they are not sure how to do it right. So then they don’t do Valentine’s Day at all – or if they get grumpy – which annoys the woman, it can add enough strain to make the whole thing go south, even if you are both pretending to celebrate Valentine’s Day with a proper dinner. Arg!

I took a whole series of seminars from an amazing woman who teaches women and men how to understand and be happy with each other. It was one of the first things I treated myself to when I started making some money. I had to figure this guy-thing out.

Amongst the series of weekend lectures that I was ultimately happy to spend a ton of money for, I was SHOCKED to learn two things. Literally knock-me-over-with-a-feather shocked. Actually, the whole room of women I was with gasped when the trainer told us what I’m about to tell you.

At the time she made her statement, there was a group of men standing on the stage in front of us sharing their points of view with the room. (I thought I was listening to a foreign language being explained.) When the trainer spoke this pressing truth, the audience of women gasped with incredulity and the men stared in surprise. The statement was so obvious to them that they were baffled why we were so shocked.

What does all this have to do with Valentine’s Day? Everything. You’ll see.

Here is an approximation of what she said: Girls, put down your pen and paper. Sit there because I want you to get this. I have interviewed men for Continue reading →